hurting men

Chris Kreussling of who writes about gardening at the Flatbush Gardener blog, kindly pointed out that what I set up on my computer, may not look the same on your computer -- hopefully I have fixed that problem!

So I had to satisfy my curiosity as to who Chris Kreussling was, of course, and visited his very interesting and informative blog. It seems many of his concerns are similar to mine, particularly as to how we can live (and garden) without making too much of a detrimental impact on the natural world around us.

I was also very interested in Chris' website.

It wrenches my heart that we as human beings can inflict so much pain on each other. Although not directly related to the abuse of men/boys, I couldn't help but marvel at the coincidence that I have just been re-reading Stiffed, The Betrayal of the American Man, by Susan Faludi (William Morrow and Co., Inc., New York, 1999). Very well documented, this book points out the many ways in which both men and women, but particularly men, feel cheated by their world and its economic and historical forces. Both men and women have been pushed into roles which have very little to do with what they might have been able to contribute if their society allowed.

Faludi points out ways in which nearly everyone feels disempowered in our society today in some way. Like a cornered animal, often the greatest cruelties are perpetrated upon others by those who are the most fearful and insecure, and are therefore unaware and have a diminished capacity for empathy. Yet Faludi argues that the paradigm of confrontation that disempowered groups coopted from men has limitations, particularly in dealing with what men themselves are feeling! That's why there is such a great deal at stake " in the liberation of the one population uniquely poised to discover and employ a new paradigm -- men." It's a fascinating book!