Tuesday, December 19, 2006

my story

There are some stories that I hesitate to share. People who know me may find that is a funny statement, because I tend to talk about just about anything that occurs to me, even here on this "public" blog. But that's the way of stories. Not every story gets told as easily as others. Some stories are too painful, others too tender.

This story is so sweet and new that I'm afraid it's too new and fragile to share. But here goes.

I told my son my story today, or alluded to it, and then started to talk about something else, without even realizing it. However, my son was more intuitive than usual today and wouldn't let me get away with that.

You didn't think I'd notice you segued away real quickly to another topic. You were pretty smooth, Mom. Don't you want to talk about him?

Gee! Who knew sons could be like that?

So, I fessed up. I met a wonderful man who really makes me happy. So, here I am, in a long-distance relationship; he's an American, I'm a Canadian...

Again, my son stopped me:

Don't allow all the worries about the future prevent you from enjoying this moment right now, he scolded. Is it exciting? Is it fun? I know I told you all sorts of reasons to be careful when you told me you were going to meet him, but I know from experience that I have often messed up a good moment for myself by thinking only of all the potential problems.

This is funny, I thought to myself. My son's reactions to the very idea of a man in my life have varied from overly protective to neutral to disdain to disgust in the past -- never enthusiasm for me and my happiness.

He asked me some questions and I told him some of the things my man has said to me. Those are the kind of things a good guy says, my son tried to explain... (isn't he cute? I mean I know this is a good guy and all, already)

My son went into a brief summary of his difficult journey over the last year or so and his New Year's resolutions. In a few sentences, my son neatly ticked off the issues in his life he had resolved, the new goals he has and the wisdom he has gained as a result, wisdom that he felt I had to know now.

Don't you just love it when your kids grow up and can give you the benefit of their wisdom? And don't think for a minute that I'm saying that with any sense of irony. I'm saying it out of appreciation for the gift it is, grateful to be able to share my happiness and enjoy the benefit of the support and perspectives of adult children who care about me and are happy for me!

It's at times like this that I am amazed and humbled at the loving, wise, generous, brave and strong children I somehow brought into this world. Plus, I have a wonderful, loving man in my life as well! Who knew I could be so damned happy!


Blogger Annie in Austin said...

What a lovely post, Kati - grown children can be such amazing people that you are proud just to know them!
It's wonderful to know you are happy with your new friend.
Annie at the Transplantable Rose

11:55 p.m.  
Anonymous M Sinclair Stevens said...

Lovely story. Isn't it great when you're children turn out to be even better than you ever dreamed they could be?

9:49 p.m.  
Blogger sisah said...

>Gee! Who knew sons could be like that?<
I know that feeling, but these moments are very rare!
My son is twenty-two but still not grown-up really.

2:53 p.m.  

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